How we begin the morning can set the direction for the rest of the day. Repeating a simple daily ritual creates stability, interrupts old autopilot patterns, and makes it easier to meet life’s changes with steadiness. The smallest practices can guide the day in a calmer, more grounded direction.

With CPTSD, mornings can feel overwhelming. Your body may wake in a stress state or your mind may slip into trauma loops. Taking a few minutes for a grounding ritual can calm the nervous system and begin to rebuild a sense of safety.

It can interrupt the trauma loop which over time helps re-wire the nervous system. A grounding ritual helps bring you back to the present where the past often intrudes. You will be building a steady anchor at the beginning of the day to build self-trust and remind you that you have choice in how you respond.

This is how you begin to feel that this is you. Over time you internalize these habits. Though they start off with just practice and thought, repeating them over and over, is how it becomes part of you. Along with other practices, you’ll learn that you matter, you are resilient (you’re showing this right now) and that you have choice. 

I used to do this three times a day, sometimes two. Now I mostly focus on the morning. 

Again this is not about perfection and it is about doing your best when you can. I have let a day here and there pass by. It’s ok. Do not set yourself these goals that seem so big you end up defeating yourself before you get to them. 

Do your best to be consistent as much as you can but not perfect. Sometimes, we let a goal or new habit get so big in our heads that we don’t follow through.

Just start small like looking at the color of the sky and remain as consistent as you can. The more you do it the easier it becomes and gains momentum. Once you start you’ll find that sometimes you do have that extra minute to add something else in, like 5 slow breaths or arm movements.

Here is an example of mine:

Morning Routine

1. Stay away from screens first thing in the morning. This is not about the “evils” of technology, cell phones or social media. It’s about starting the day with precious time for yourself. It’s about choosing what you let in and what you let influence you as well.

Do not look at your phone 1st thing in the morning, nope not even for the time. This precious time is for you. You can get a nightstand clock if you need to. But no artificial light.. 

I promise I’m not some cavewoman, I have a phone, tv, etc. But we are so overly stimulated by so many things we don’t even realize it: phones, tv, computers, the radio, even light at night… Yes I know these can also be beneficial and helpful but just a minute of calm and being with yourself is important too.  

When you are healing from CPTSD, but in general as well, what you expose yourself to, whether it’s the news, social media, or other people, can have a significant impact on your wellbeing. It can either be uplifting or neutral but it can also be very negative and lead you into doomscrolling or thinking things are worse than they are. You then end up focusing on that and the status quo stays the same.

You are trying to shift your mindset here, so choose the direction you want to go and how you want to be.

2. Take a slow deep breath – with a slower exhale. You can put your hand to your chest if that feels more grounding to you.

3. Look at natural light and Nature Breath in the outdoor air if you can. Open a window, go outside if you can. Look at the sky and just take it in, regardless of whether it’s blue, raining, cloudy…. Are there birds, trees, what are you noticing. Notice anything in nature.

4. Set an intent for the day.

This can be verbal (even if just in your head) such as: I am at peace in this moment, I am ok, It’s all good. Whatever works for you and keep it simple. If you need some help and encounter resistance, not that you will either, it’s okay and part of Complex PTSD as well.

You can check out my Word Bank Here and read the section on Positivity giving you anxiety here.

But it can be non-verbal as well. For example, notice a calm spot on your body. If there is a part that is ailing, pretend that part of you can breathe. Engage in a soft smile…

You are checking in with yourself. Re-establishing safety and comfort. Setting the tone for the rest of the day. 

5. Drink some water, yes before coffee or tea. Hydrate your body. Have your coffee and breakfast after water.

6. Journaling. I will write separate posts on journaling and this remains optional as part of your routine and/or recovery.

I personally resisted journaling for years and for several reasons. I didn’t really believe it could be helpful and I thought it would take too much time out of my mornings and days.

Notice the pre-existing thought that I had already decided it wouldn’t work before even giving it a try. If you notice this in yourself, try to take a step back and be curious about it. Try to be flexible and non-judgemental about your thoughts, feelings etc.

If you don’t know this is okay too. A lot of what “feels natural” isn’t always obvious. It’s more about trusting in your choices than making an actual “right choice”. It’s a process – there are no wrong answers. 

Some examples of what to write to check-in:

A simple: Good morning. My feet are on the ground, I am grounded, literally anything that you can think of that is helpful. Check out my word bank again here.

They don’t need to be affirmations. It can also be the trees are green. The temperature is changing outside. It’s also about creating a mindshift and taking a break from the trauma loops or pain that we can focus on when in Complex PTSD or too lost in our daily lives. I’ve written another post about that here. 

When I skip days, I sometimes go back in my journal and re-write some things for those days. This is personal, but I find that it helps me with consistency which is key in anything that you are going to do. Any little thing. A reminder (yes another one) that this is not about perfection and writing the perfect thing or being able to do this consistently in the beginning.

Do your best, keep it simple and small and manageable

A note on time management: Somet thoughts that might come up: “I don’t have time for all of this. I have to get ready, I feel too bad, I have to take the kids to school prepare the lunch etc. 

Instead of leading with why and what you “can’t” do something, try finding what it is that you can do. For example, waking up without the phone, taking a breath, and looking at natural daylight with a small self-checkin , can take just a few minutes. Any small thing, and try to take that and make it consistent. Remember that you are doing something.

Start Small: It’s about creating a small routine to help you establish a new grounding ritual. Can you just look outside. Can you try taking a breath while lying down. If you forgot in the morning, totally ok – can you take a minute later, at anytime during the day…

Also if this post gets you irritated on how little time you have, observe your feeling at this with non-judgement and with curiosity. Maybe you need this more than you think. This is all meant to help and is not about being right or wrong. 

What is irritating you? Is that you feel you don’t have time? That it’s not enough to heal your pain? That people can not possibly understand the suffering you are going through? [ACM insert exercise on taking a step back and noticing body withouth judgement)

If so, can you observe this feeling and be curious about it as well? Knowing that this article is meant to help and not infuriate, is it touching on something else that is initiating this strong response?

Also, for some things we have to choose to make them a priority. I think sometimes we tell ourselves, when I have more time, then I will…. But I actually think that we have to make time. Granted some times in our lives are busier than others and of course life gets in the way, but this is also meant to learn how to be flexible.

There will always be curveballs, things will change. The best strategy I’ve found, is to learn and be flexible and respond instead of trying to control every little thing in my outside environment.

Anyway, back on focus.

While the steps outlined above look long on paper. This is meant to be simple and for you and find some time for yourself. Find the time, find those two minutes when you can for those first steps. Time does not magically appear. As with any habit, we have to make time and make it a priority. 

Mid Day – Especially in the beginning of your healing. You want to try and a few minutes to check in with yourself. Again, it can be a simple, wording. Putting your bare feet on the ground, looking outside and saying something to yourself. Eventually, you’ll need to check-in less often

Nightime: Again, more important in the beginning of the healing journey, for me at least. I know this may be hard to do as well because you may be exhausted.

If you find you don’t need Mid Day and Nighttime checkins that’s okay too.

Just take stock of your day. Say good night to the sky and try to find gratitude for one thing. It can be anything. That you are able to walk, that you had less flashbacks, as simple or complex as you want it to be.  

I know that sometimes, you can also be too wired for sleep, I’ve had this issue also, especially when I was hypervigilant. Again, I am not an expert but I would still recommend, taking this time to ground yourself. Be in the moment with yourself, or if you feel ready, with a loved one.

Remember: Healing, your healing, is possible.